A Portland woman, Danielle Klock, recently ventured into psilocybin therapy to confront the grief of losing her son.
Klock’s son, Jet Klock, who battled psychosis, passed away in September 2023 at the young age of 25 due to complications arising from living on the streets.
Reflecting on her experience as a mother, Klock expressed that being Jet’s mom was a blend of both challenges and beauty.
“Being Jet’s mom was the most challenging and the most beautiful experience of my life,” she shared, tearing up at the memory.
As she wrestles with the permanence of her loss, Klock remarked, “For the rest of my life, I’m going to be the mother of a dead son. And that’s not what I wanted for my life, and it’s not what I wanted for his life, and I’m stuck with it.”
Acknowledging the weight of her grief, Klock pursued a new path to learn how to live with the loss.
“I know that Jet wants me to be OK,” she said, voicing the inner conflict of pain and the desire to heal.
Determined to transform her sorrow, Klock stated, “There’s no avoiding grief, and there’s no avoiding pain — and so, what do we do with it?”
Seeking a change, Klock chose to explore psilocybin therapy at Seven Gates Sanctuary in Northeast Portland.
This therapeutic journey was documented by KGW reporter Stephanie Domurat and her camera crew, who witnessed Klock as she prepared to embark on this unique form of healing.
She was guided by Lindsey Lerner, a licensed psilocybin facilitator and clinical psychologist, who expressed her strong belief in the power of psilocybin as a means of healing.
“I truly believe that this has the potential to heal the world,” Lerner affirmed.
Rebecca shared how psilocybin can open up new pathways in the mind, allowing individuals to approach grief and emotional struggles from a refreshed perspective.
Klock was administered middle-range potency McKennaii mushrooms in a serene environment known as the Rose Room during her session.
While the therapy session itself was not filmed due to legal restrictions, the follow-up a week later revealed a significant shift in Klock’s outlook.
In her post-therapy reflection, Klock conveyed, “[I’m] great. Yeah, everything feels different.”
Describing the four-hour experience, she noted its intensity and how she felt disconnected from her physical self.
“I really felt like I was out of my body quite a lot; I wasn’t sure if my eyes were open or closed,” she explained, finding it challenging to articulate the essence of her experience.
However, the emotional impact of the session was profound for Klock.
“This experience was probably the most profound gift that I’ve ever received in my entire life because it encompassed my entire life. And now, I get to experience the rest of my life in a new way,” she stated, emphasizing a newfound sense of acceptance.
Reflecting on her emotional state before the therapy, Klock noted, “I don’t know that I can relate to that person anymore.”
This individual felt almost like a childhood friend she had lost touch with, evoking a surprising sense of emotional detachment rather than loss.
Klock articulated, “There’s no sense of loss, though … It’s just the opposite.”
Acknowledging that the grief of losing her son would always be present, she conveyed that it had transformed.
“I still get some difficult emotions, of course — I’m still human,” Klock admitted.
Yet, she noticed that the waves of sadness she once faced had slowed and were less frequent.
“The grief has transformed for me into something softer; it’s not something that I dread anymore,” she affirmed, likening her feelings to a gentle companion rather than a tidal wave.
Klock concluded with poignant clarity, saying, “If I could choose to have my son alive, of course, that’s what I would choose — and I can’t choose that. I don’t get that.”
She ultimately regarded her transformational experience with grief as the most beautiful outcome she could have hoped for, expressing gratitude for the healing journey.
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